Chris Kenny

Chris Kenny

Murdoch minion Chris “Wooshy” Kenny is most famous for pursuing a lawsuit against some people who made a very unserious joke implying that Chris Kenny fucks dogs. In light of his litigiousness, we definitely don’t want to speculate on why an obvious joke that Chris Kenny fucks dogs hurt his feelings so much, but here’s our honest opinion of the sequence of events…

  • Chris Kenny’s master, Rupert Murdoch, is a fascist warmonger who makes billions of dollars perpetuating wars and racist division by using his media conglomerate to spread lies.
  • Rupert Murdoch’s worst enemy in Australia is the Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC) who, as a publicly owned company, are compelled to be truthful and unbiased, meaning that Murdoch’s lies and propaganda are often completely obliterated by the ABC’s attempts to report the truth.
  • Rupert Murdoch does everything he can to bring down the ABC in Australia, which most often involves using his loyal LNP politicians to push for budget cuts or to put far-right extremists on the board of directors.
  • The Chaser’s War on Everything was a show on the ABC that satirised Australian politics and fascist pseudo-journalists like Chris Kenny. They made a joke that Chris Kenny fucks dogs. Not a single sane, sensible person in the country took it seriously, because it was an obvious joke, made on a satirical TV show.
  • Fascist warmonger Rupert Murdoch saw an opportunity to continue his ongoing mission to destroy the Australian public broadcaster and Chris Kenny was told to sue by his master.
  • Eventually, Murdoch’s well-practised legal team won over the Australian people, and taxpayers were forced to pay for hurting the feelings of one of Murdoch’s lackeys. All because of an overtly satirical joke about Chris Kenny fucking dogs.

It’s our opinion that what we perceive as Chris “Wooshy” Kenny’s inability to understand satire makes him extremely dangerous. Kenny has shown that he is willing to use his master’s billions of dollars to drag anyone who criticises him through the court system in order to silence them and prevent any free speech that hurts his feelings or contradicts his fascist narrative. This tendency to censor and silence critics – and Kenny’s complete subservience to his master Murdoch no matter what the cost to everyday Australians – is extremely dangerous.

Chris Kenny thinks he’ll be remembered as “the journalist called a dog fucker who stood up for his rights”, but to Australia, Chris Kenny will always be remembered as the Murdoch lapdog that took money from taxpayers to help his master control the world, just because someone made a joke that Chris Kenny is a dog fucker.

BTW, even though this is clearly a site dedicated to satirical piss-taking, we feel like we need to clarify that this article is obviously satire. Much like Chris Kenny’s career, this article is a joke. Only someone with an insurmountable sexual attraction to canines could possibly think this article is serious. So please don’t sue us, you censorious dipshits.

(We’re pretty sure we don’t have to worry, because suing us wouldn’t hurt the publicly funded Australian broadcaster that Kenny and his master are trying so desperately to silence while they use their own platform to push their fascist agenda, but hey, arrogance may prevail!)

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